Rejections...

Ever felt rejected before? always you say?? ya.. me too.. :(

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And you think that you'll get over it and when the next rejection come, we can handle it better.. eh.. If that is the case, I dun think I can handle rejection at all... haih...

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I had to be honest with how i feel... I will be as polite and kind as I possibly could but that is how I feel at the time and I need to express it.... feeling rejected and unwanted, not needed..

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haih.. but I know I cannot always be like this.. but I care... that is why i feel tt way.. should I not care? So I do not feel tt way? eh.. eh.. eh...? haih... perhaps I should just learn to take rejection like a man.. i mean.. like a woman.. u know.. strong and lady like :P

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I've always been the black sheep in a way... or may be that is how I myself see it? Not part of the 'group', not in the 'gang'.. loner.. I tried not to make others feel rejected, but why do I always feel tt way ler? Could be just ME.. my weakness.. my own selfishness.. is it?

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Anyway... Even if I feel hurt or rejected.. I will not allow that feeling to turn to unforgiveness or hate.. coz that will hinder God's work and all tt I hv done may just go down the drain just because of one sin.. I WILL NOT ALLOW IT!!! Devil! Dun hold me down with lies!! I will not be defeated by it.. I may feel bad and down at the time.. but I will not stay down for long.. Coz i got Jesus!!! He showed me the redemption he has for me everytime I feel tt way.. :) and It's just perfect!

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Lord, You are so awesome.. thank you for opening my eyes.. and my heart.. amen..