Heavy rain today... Really heavy and stormy afternoon in KL.. Feels drenched by the sound of rain and distance thunder.. The view, as you can see, is gloomy with a hint of lighting once a while.. It feels heavy, my soul feels heavy.. But it's not the worst or bad feeling one could experience at this moment..
Why? Because I use to feel fear.. Absolute fear every time it rains heavily in the afternoon.. Especially when the world becomes so darken by the clouds and the trees are being blown away by the strong wind.. It's scary.. Afternoons should always be bright, sunny and hot! It should not look like "the end of the world is coming."
Throughout the years, I have learn to overcome this fear of expecting what is unexpected, especially when it's a gloomy situation. I am a positive kinda person after all but being fearful on a terribly rainy and stormy day is somewhat more than just being melancholic.. Perhaps it was my uncontrollable emotions, that had led me to this conclusion of fear.. Perhaps it was my wild imaginations that have led me to believe there is something to fear about the abnormality of the world.. or about the things I think should be 'normal'... but we all need the rain, even if it's a stormy, gloomy and scary one.. we need the rain.. don't you agree?
So now I no more fear, but rather I feel heavy.. not with something bad or doubtful wonders.. Just that it rains and it looks so dark and glum.. yet I know.. the rain will stop, eventually, and the sun will again rise for another day.. The difference is that I am no more fearful; the difference is I learn to appreciate the rain, the storm, the thunder; I learn to understand the loneliness sometimes I feel and how lonely it must be for some other people in the world too.. sometimes.... just by looking into the rainy day..
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